Well, this will certainly put you off your Christmas dinner. Gross. A woman named Debra Parsons is grieving the death of her mother Doreen. She’ll have her mom over for dinner anyway, just in a different way. She’s going to sprinkle her ashes on her turkey and her Christmas pudding and then dig in. Man, that’s one step off cannibalism. No. Thank. You.
Debra is 41. She has felt the insane urge to eat Doreen’s ashes since she died in May. She ingests a small spoonful most days to feel as close to her as possible. With the holidays approaching, the urge has become even greater for her to consume dear old mom.
“It is the only thing that will get me through my first Christmas without mum,” said Debra. “People might think I’m mad or that it’s not a very respectful thing to do but I just can’t stop myself. I see it as a positive thing – allowing her to be close to me and also involving her in the family day. I feel like she can live on by being inside of me because if she is part of me she can breathe through my body. My breath is her breath. It will be my first Christmas without her and I want her to be involved and this is the only way that feels right to me.”
This woman needs professional help… stat. Her mother died suddenly from an airway obstruction after suffering a chest infection in May. I’m sure she would never in her wildest nightmares have thought her daughter would snack on her ashes like this. Debra already had mental issues. She had lost a son during Christmas of 1996, when he was born prematurely. She has another child… who I feel very sorry for. She has been in a deep depression ever since and her mother dying finally tipped her over mentally.
“My mum and I had a really strong bond and one which could never be broken, even by death,” Debra said. “She has been the one who has helped me through all the other ups and downs of my life and then suddenly she just wasn’t there any more. I was distraught.” Ya think?
After the funeral and her mom’s cremation, Debra began to ponder what to do with her mother’s ashes. Instead of putting them in an urn of some sort and keeping them somewhere, or scattering them somewhere, Debra decided instead on consumption.
“It wasn’t something I had ever thought about,” Debra said. “I always thought I would have more time to think about it. I knew Mum was ill but never expected her to pass away when she did. So when she went I had that feeling of huge loss but also of regret over all the things that went unsaid and all the times we would miss in the future. I decided I wanted to do something with her ashes that would make a difference to how we remembered her. I didn’t want to just scatter them because that would feel like throwing her away.” I would have looked at it as setting her free.
A couple of months later, Debra’s two sisters delivered her share of the ashes to her home. They split them up? That’s off all by itself. Her sisters had no idea of Debra’s yet to be decided upon intentions.
“At first I kept them in a plastic sandwich bag. I wanted to be with them all the time so I had them by my bed or with me around the house. Then I got a little box for them so I could have them on display but no matter what I did I just couldn’t get that feeling of closeness.” One day, she was missing her mother more than usual and just made up her mind. “I don’t know what made me do it the first time – it was just an urge. I can’t describe it. I opened the box and licked my fingers and just dipped them into the powder. Before I knew what I was doing they were in my mouth and the chalky, salty taste was comforting. I felt confused by what I had done to begin with but the feeling of comfort and closeness it brought was the first bit of solace I’d had since her death.”
Then she began to obsess about consuming the ashes. She made plans to take her intentions to the next level at Christmas. “I have been having a little taste most days – sometimes on my finger or on a little spoon. But Christmas has always been a really difficult time of year since the anniversary of my son’s death is December 28 and as it gets close this year I feel the urge even more. Christmas is a special time of year when you want to be close to the ones you love the most and I feel the loss of those that aren’t here more strongly now than ever. But I don’t want to just eat the ashes on my fingers – I’d like my mum to be a part of the celebration this year so I will have her with my Christmas dinner. We will have a place laid for her and a picture of her on the table so she can be with us on the very special day.”
Unbelievably, her fiance is supporting her in this. Although, he doesn’t want his name mentioned. Go figure. They plan to marry next year. Perhaps a pre-nup is in order that specifically states that if he goes first, she’s not allowed to eat him. “I am lucky that my loved ones understand what I am doing,” said Debra, of Folkestone, Kent. “And I know my mum would have been happy for me to do whatever I needed to get over no longer having her in my life.” That’s sick on a whole new level.
H/T: The Mirror
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