Hasan To Sue For Excessive Use Of Force

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By Ima Tuele
New York Times News Service

Army Major Nadik Hasan, the alleged shooter in the deaths of thirteen people in Ft Hood, Texas, has hired Thomas Dewey of the prestigious Washington, DC law firm of Dewey, Cheatum and Howe to represent him in a lawsuit against policewoman Kimberly Munley for excessive use of force.

Hasan, in stable condition in a Texas hospital has been paralyzed by the four bullets the policewoman pumped into his body. "Clearly this was a case of excessive use of force, and my client is paying a heavy price for it," said Dewey.

"My client, Mr Hasan was at the wrong place and the wrong time, and now has become the victim himself," Dewey added. "I mean, was it really necessary to pump four bullets into the man? Wouldn't one have been sufficient? Two at the most?"

Dewey says that his law firm will also enlist the aid of the American Criminal Libelous Union [ACLU], an organization dedicated to decriminalizing criminal behavior, in accessing their national network of activists to create the appearance of a groundswell of public support for his client.

He said that previous attempts by the ACLU to create faux groundswell support of convicted cop killer Mumia Abu-Jamal have been wildly successful, convincing even the conservative icon Ed Asner of his innocence.

Dewey proclaimed that efforts to contact Asner as a character witness for his client have gone largely unanswered, probably because Asner is presently in North Korea protesting the unfounded attack from the South Korean Navy on the people's paradise of North Korea.

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nessa's picture

nt

Knight_of_the_Mind's picture

I demand to know who Mirandized KSM. I want to know what kfucktard of a defense attorney as failed to submit a writ of H.Corpus on his behalf. If he is really going into civil court, and he's been held in Gitmo for nearly a decade w/ no legal rights, can't the man just walk free tommorrow w/ the right defense attorney?

"Bringing in the AFL-CIO to pacify a tense situation is like bringing in the Hell's Angels to handle concert security." - Jim Geraghty

We can't let this happen people. We must protest. Let's meet at the Urolla / Dumas intersection at noon today and bring your tea bagging partner. My usual tea bagging partner Buckley Nekkid can't make it today so if someone could bring someone I could tea bag with I would really appreciate it! See ya there!

Knight_of_the_Mind's picture

Your previous tea-bagging partner is probably in the ICU. You give off the vibe that you'd have a nasty tendency to want to drag teeth.

"Bringing in the AFL-CIO to pacify a tense situation is like bringing in the Hell's Angels to handle concert security." - Jim Geraghty

David Hinz's picture

but for some reason I doubt your sincerity as a serious member of our community.

"Miss Tagart, do you know the hallmark of the second-rater? It's resentment of another man's achievement."